One of the perks of being a teacher is the front row seat (or at least a seat) for school assemblies. The best assemblies are the ones with a high-energy presenter that last at least forty-five minutes to an hour.
If you’re looking to secure someone to visit your school, keep the following in mind:
Try to schedule speakers that…
-pass around live animals, especially snakes. (No sudden movements, kids. This snake hasn’t eaten yet today.)
-can tear a phone book in half. (What’s a phone book, right?)
-involve teachers as part of the show. Kids love seeing their favorite teachers embarrassed.
Stay away from presenters that…
-use an “old school” slide projector.
-offer a free assembly as long as the school promises to sell something (usually a prop from the assembly).
-ask lots of open ended questions to several hundred kids at once, then immediately try to shush them up as they shout their responses.
How you guys doing today? (Cups hand to ear)What…what…I can’t hear you!!!